I'm Here & Doing Well - Will Try To Update More

Hey Everyone!!

Wow....ok....where to start, alot has happened since I last updated my blog, I now have high hopes if updating this on a fairly regualr basis and the updates may not be as long as the past ones.

Ok...to start I will let everyone know that I'm NO longer living with my ex husband....my sons and I moved last weekend into our apartment. I LOVE my apartment....don't get me wrong....I loved and do miss my big beautiful home =( but anymore it was just a structure....a home is filled with love and happiness and that house had none of that....we fought all the time, my poor kids had to see me cry all the time and that is not good. So, the move was OK....Jeff really upset me on Saturday...we started moving my stuff on Friday night BUT on Saturday he left for 6 hours to go and watch his boyfreind sing in some competition....that was ALOT of time lost when it comes to moving. So, when he came back guess who was with him....his boyfreind!!!!! Talk about rubbing salt in the wound!! I didn't want that MOFO there helping to move my stuff. Then Jeff was just a little ugly with me....we had to have the truck back at 6pm...Jeff was taking Brandon to dinner for helping....I was upset over that cause Jeff helped me for 2 days so I was going to take him to dinner....o-well, saved me money I guess...but what pissed me off was he didn't hook my washer & dryer, he didn't get my net working, he wasn't even going to hook up my TV!! He said you do it....you know I didn't even have to help with any of this crap but I'm here....I said yes, so much for telling me you would always be my best freind and be there for me no matter what....all lies, you can't even hook up my effin TV! I was mad....Brandon sat out on the truck cause that guy knew I was beyond pissed off.

Anyway, they left to return the truck, my friends Will & Jen came over at 11 pm the night I moved in and HE put my washer and stuff in place. He tried to figure out the net but couldn't get it working. Jeff came over Sunday and finsihed stuff, then took off.

OK....my love life....well, I'm NO longer seeing the doctor....I had reservations about him from the start and 4 months later just comfirmed that I was nothing more then a once a week booty call for him. Once his residency is over he will be leaving PA and moving on....he wants to travel the world and get back to a lifestyle that he loves and enjoys which is exploring the world...to me that is much more fun with someone then alone but o-well....I won't be used for sex....not now, not ever......he told me he doesn't want to settle down with anyone. From the time I stated seeing him he never stayed off the site where we met so he was always on there looking and that just upset me....if you are happy, why keep looking....I mean seriously....get real.

Anyway, I then changed my "Myspace" profile to say I was looking for Friends, Dating & Serious Relationships and wow I have had a lot of people contact me on there.....most that I'm not at all interested in but there was 1 that stuck out...he made first contact with me....like I do with everyone is read their profiles....I read his, he is a nascar fan, HUGE nascar fan but what caught my attention was a certain line on his profile and that was....most importantly I ALWAYS treat a lady like she should be treated. That caught my attention and we have talked since he first made contact with me. We started off just by e-mailing each other and then he gave me his number and said feel free to call or text me anytime...I have unlimited texting so we started texting each other....he doesn't go on the PC much at all so we have been texting and talking on the phone.

Anyway, we had our first date last night....we just went out to dinner...we sat there and talked the whole time, there was NEVER any awkward silence at all (like John & I use to have) it was nice to be around someone that I have so much in common with! After dinner he walked me to my car, we talked for a little bit and I said do you have anything else to do tonight and he was like no, not really so I asked him if he wanted to walk around the shopping plaza and he said yes, so we walked through some stores and stuff and then they all closed, we walked back to our cars and just stood there and talked some more...he then gave me a hug goodnight and we left.

I got home and sent him a text letting him know that I had a wonderful time with him, he sent me one back saying the same thing....he said I REALLY WANTED to kiss you goodnight but I didn't want to overstep any bounderies and I don't want you to feel I only want you for one thing cause that's not true....he was a total gentleman!

That just impresses me. Here is a little about him....He lives in Baltimore, Maryland, 40 yrs. old, loves Nascar and goes to many races a year, has 3 kids (20 & 3 yr. old son and a 16 yr. old daughter), does Karoke for charity as well as sometimes playing pool for charity. He is very much a do-gooder type person....says he always has a hard time saying no to people. He hates to see people hurting or crying. He is just a total sweetheart. He is VERY good with communicaton....he calls me a couple times a day, texts me throughout the day, everyday....if I send him a e-mail....get this...he answers back!! John ignored me most of the time...never would be answer a email or text....if he called me and I missed it, almost a guarantee that I would not get a return call back till the next day or days later....John was very frustrating. Rusty reminds me sooooo of Jeff when it comes to communication....in 16 years of being with Jeff there was never a day that went by that we didn't talk to each other in some form....whether it be email, text or a phone call/s.

So far I'm just taking things slow....I really wasn't looking for Rusty when he came into the picture.....I just changed my settings on Myspace and that was it. I didn't go onto the site where I met John cause I was like piss on it.....I'm busy, I'm moving, I have no time for this crap....I also didn't like the fact that I was being used for a once a week booty call with John....but even though I had reservations about John you never know till you date someone....but 4 months down the road and you are still only seeing me once a week.....yeah, OK, doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure that one out....o-well....he can go explore the world, he is extremely independent and very stubborn in his thinking and for that, John will end up being alone....thing is....he doesn't really care....he told me once before he is totally fine being alone for the rest of his life...he said don't get me wrong....I love the companionship but if I don't have it....I don't really care....well, not things to REALLY want to say around the woman you are dating! Jerk....LOL

Anyway, Rusty is a total sweetheart! Will keep this blog updated =)